One man to second man: I'm thinking of giving up blogging.
Second man to the one man:But where will your readers go when they need to hear somebody whine about how unfair life is?

I took this one up from one of Hugh McLeod's Blog cartoons.
Ok.I am the 'one man'.I am Psycho The WonderKid.I do keep writing about my daily woes and how I constantly crib and whine about my life.I wonder sometimes if we write blogs to show others how miserable and pathetic we are.And of course take a definite pride in being so.And then pry into others and read personal life blogpost incidents.Maybe some even practice voyeurism.Its all a relative thing.But the entire idea of a blog,I believe, is about the freedom of it.I mean no one can really charge you of criticizing or plagiarism,being imaginative or even cryptomnesia.
Yes,I did start up blogging just for-the-heck-of-it.Actually,I started blogging because a certain someone had once asked me to take it up.No,wait.I started to let out the emotions and dark feelings.I really dont know why I took up this writinn blogs.I did want others to read about what life had taught me.And what it didnt.Mainly,it was the didnt part.I never really learn much.Its like one of those things you get to see on the Saturday late night shows.You get to learn about a new thing and forget it as soon as you .......forget it.Its like an ex-convict never learns about domestic beating.That kind of learning.
I was 30-minute interviewed by some of my senior collegues about how much I should learn and in turn,self-improve by changing habits and being innovative.Innovative,I am.But changing,thats not really happening.Yes,so self-improvement is what most of the people lay stress on.Self-improvement is not rocket-science or a brain-rape.Well,it is a kind of rape.But self-improvement is self-improvement.Thats what everyone does.Trying to get better.And better.And better.Till they eventually think that being better is not really worth it.So lets die.
Its what each one of us do.In our mundane jobs,at house,academics,sports,financially.
I never did understand this term.I mean why improve when that improvement is actually not an improvement.You take the bloody pains of getting to that next level.And when you reach that level,you feel thats you've been stupid about going to that level and that you should have targeted higher.And this goes on and on.
Its just a type of mental masturbation.You realize its futile,but no does really thinks that.Why cant we just stay the same and then let improvement ( or whatever!!) happen to us normally.Hehe! There I go whining again.
Its all a brain-rape sitatuion,aint it.Just like this post.

Who's stupid!!!!

Everyone says I'm stupid.In a way,well ye,I'm a bit stupid.Especially after these.


At some private party,some time back.....Rohit,Me and Koli.Yes,I'm a bit drunk.
Rohit :Man,I heard that Shireen's aunt's cousin sister has passed away.....
Koli:Ohh!!Shit!.Shireen's aunt's who???!!
Me:Long live !The Queen is dead!!!
Shireen walks in.......................................
Me:Long Live ! She's dead!!!.....yaaay-yaaay-yaaay!!!...The Queen is dead...!!!!
Shireen:Who's dead???
Me:Zed's dead,baby,Zed's dead!!!!


At some CCD in South Calcutta........
Rahul:Hey Amit,wassup....
By the way Amit,This is Debanuj.
Me: Hi,dude.
Amit:Hi,man.
Rahul:So as Rishab was telling me about the whole deal,Amit had called up in between.....
Me:Now who the fuck is Amit???
*Everyone looks at me*


In Koregaon Park,while I was getting the tatoo done.
Me:Omigosh!!!..Its hurting!!..God,help me!!!!! Owwwww!!Its hurting.
*Everyone looking at me*
Sabby:I havent touched the needle yet!!!!
Me:Ohh!


Every year!
Summer.Me(sweating) :Why,God,why??You know I hate the heat!!!
Monsoons.Me(drenched) :Why,God,why??You know I hate the muddy rain!!!
Autumn.Me(trying to act sick) :Why,God,why??You know I hate the ..ummm....wind!!!
Winter.Me(freezing) :Why,God,why??You know I hate the cold!!!

All round the clock.Me: Why,God,why???????


Me,badly drunk,with a chocolate bar.College.About to propose to an unknown girl,three years junior.Rishi smirking ...ten yards away.
Girl incidentally called Jaita Ray.
Me:Hai,I'm Daevaanooj.Shee,Ai've found you pretty shweeet and allll.And I have shum speshaaal feelingsh phor you.
Jaita:Thats ok,*bhaiya* (Ka-ching!!!!).Actually I have a boyfriend,and I'm very serious about it.
Me:Ohh!.Thats ok,you have a great day.Bubye.
She leaves.
I eat the chocolate.Rishi joins in.


Shit!!I am the wierdly stupid one.!!!

You know those old songs which you hear after a long-long time and then fall in love with it.
I've,suddenly,fallen in love with the Dylan song,Tangled up in Blue.I keep listening to it and then singing it out,until someone just asks me to stop.
Damn!I was never meant to be a bathroom singer!!!!
And defnitely I gotta go and shamelessly see this new Rajnikanth movie,Shivaji and see what the fuss is all about!!!!

I mean whats with this caste and the religion.Lets start with religion.And by religion Im generally indicating to the extremist part of it.I'm pointing out to what I saw on the News today and what I read in Aniruddh Bhattacharya(CNN-IBN journalist) blog.Yes,Mr. Rushdie being knighhood-ed.I like it as Sir Rushdie too.I sometimes think all this fuss about religion is just an excuse for the actions of humanity.And then mixing culture and religion.I like culture.Its the religion part I aint sure about.Its a free world isnt it.How can works of art and literature,and sometimes sports collide with this vast domain called religion.This is absolutely blasphemous,slanderous and irrational.I know its the fury of the human emotions.But are emotions so intense,so as to challenge the very talents of an individual??? Rushdie,Hussain,the Danish cartoons ecetra ecetra.Is art really becoming a channel for staging religious sentiments??
I'm very very biased on any sensitive religious issue.Thats because I'm a wee bit open minded about religion.Maybe,I shouldnt really give a shit.
And then the caste.This is a bit more personal.Im mainly talking about relationships.
Everyone around me seems to have this caste problem in their families whenever it comes to 'love' relationships.Ive seen it mainly with the Southies,but I guess its there in Bengali families too.Someone aint allowed to date cause the other is from a different caste and shit.I mean someone should shove up some fucken sense into these 'casties'.I'm glad my parents are pretty open about this.But it sometimes gets on the nerves to see people around me actually bothered by such issues in life.Take this from a Brahmin who eats beef.Caste....hmpfh....bullshit!!!

Yes,faithless convictions,thats what!!!

I got myself drenched in the rains after ages.I mean proper turbulent torrential rains.Not the drizzles or the cloudbursts.Proper rains.Whoever said,"You'll catch a cold".Whatever.Its not just the getting wet part and the whole enjoyment of it.Its not about getting drenched on the bikes or on the roof or the streets.Its the whole feeling of enjoying that chilly wind and the force of the rain droplets on your face.Yes,the whole feeling of being free.Of washing away all those woes,sorrow,anger and whatever you people call them.The excitement of something new happening to our life.And then smile at that forgotten feeling about being special.Yes,that feeling.

Terrance Hill and Bud Spencer.Yes,the famous Italian pair.I remember them.I idolized being Hill.Beating up the bad guys with a Malboro and that funny-looking hat.And then end up with a fist fight with Bud at sunset.Funny.That was a darn long time ago.Now my life's more like Prof Solanka in this Salman Rushdie book,Fury.I wish I could write as subtly and delicately as him.Hmm,lesse...I wanna read The Rum Diaries,the next.And hopefully complete "The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy" soon.And hence I'd never get to read Shantaraam,before Mira Nair and Johnny Depp releases it.Or maybe I should stop reading at all from now on,stop listening to King Creole,stop watching football and also stop drinking beer.Yes,ignorance and sleep would be bliss then.Maybe its just the diversity in me.Or the taste.Its cliched.But it all comes with the maybe.You can add all the sacrasm and skepticism.Then all the choices,decisions to make.Include the taxes.The income tax mainly,which is probably used for sleazy government activities.Sometimes exhibit passion,vehemence in the streets or sometimes at home.And defintely there are all those fucks and the non-fucks.Or be a cult fashion or youth figure like Che and be dummily incenerated by those still-existing KKK followers.Yes,those darn dumb fucks.DDF.
So where was I?
Yes,so.Its like sugarcane juice.Extra sweet.No,the bittery-sweet.Maybe a Cachaca-sweet.The one which gives you pleasure.And puts you to bed after the fourth.At fifth,I should just go about with my own life and stop worrying about others.Others,no.Everyone,rather.Life( as they call it,who????) might get a wee-bit meaningful,then.
Yes,see.The little figments of imagination.The ones that make you happily lost.Just like this.Not the last one.But yes,this.This.

I'm Twittering too much nowadays.Its a stupid fucky little public scrappy thing.Its really very very stupid.Its not Orkut.Or hi5.Or Facebook and Bingbox.This a global community of friends and strangers answering one simple question: What are you doing? As in me.And you.And the global community.Notched it up from one of Hugh McLeod's post.You guys shouldnt do it.Its silly.I just do it to make myself just heard by someone.So that I dont even get to hear what that-someone even has to say about me.This,as usual,doesnt make any sense.

And thanks,Angshu,I really owe you one.I loved it.Saw it.The incidents were stupid.And so was picture.But then again.It was great.Awesome,actually.

This post is really really special to me for unknown silly confessions.Yes,silly,but confessions.

Bad writing,bad writing!
This is what I tell myself,everytime I write a post.Then I keep looking at the few alphabets I've typed down in my laptop or the office PC.Keep looking at it again.Till blogger.com autosaves it as a draft.Maybe even pondering over the thought of registering myself in Shaadi.com.
I light up once,drink some coffee,stare at the ceiling.At the dusty fan blades.Or maybe at the bright lights in the office.
People just pass by staring and wondering sorts.
"He never works,and yet he gets the prize.Bastard!"
"Ha,the funny little shit is upto his pranks again."
"Should I just peep into his computer and see what he's doing?"
"Look at him,if only I could work half as much as him.He's a personified workaholic"
"Kya baat hai,Debu mereko dekh'ke itna haas kyon raha hai???
"Denge Ra !!!!" (Means "Fuck you,man" in Telegu)
"Hi......................................**sigh**!!!"

The boss comes,I uncomfortably minimize the Blogger window.Look at him with those fake eyes while all he asks me are some meaningless numbers.Damn!Sometimes those dreamy eyes don't help either.I 'restore' the window back.Suddenly realize how Microsoft and Bill Gates have made our lives easier.Maybe.And then think about the bad writing all over again.Ok,lets start over.

You know those times when you listen to a song.You cant get enough of it.So u keep playing it in your mind all the time.Banana Pancakes and Under the Tracks.I'm playing too much of it.Maybe lets Wiki this.No,no bad writing again.

All that lies beneath,all that I can see.Its too dark a world.Too bleak a fate.So at the end of it all,everything still remains a mystery.Unsolved by the sands of time.Or by the winds of change...........................................
*Think more -think more!!! This is definitely good writing,you are getting there*

Ocean's 13 makes me wanna go to Las vegas. And be a part of Danny's crew.Wear those Armani suits.And gamble.I loved the dice method.Good.Too good.Damn!

And I won the Performer of the Month prize in my project....
WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO-HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!

:)

Whats in a city name,anyway!!!

Delhi is a darn lucky city.Its our esteemed capital and even Hollywood likes it.It has not succumbed to the fate of getting its name changed either. Delhi is still the same old Delhi.Not Dilli or Deli or Dwelli or Dooglii.
Ive finally found out the reason why city names in India are changed so frequently.They say it cuz they wanna make it sound very Indian-ish and regional-ish.Last day I was watching this in some news channel,where a handful of this certain people are still protesting against the name "Bengaleru".Doesnt help,does it??

Ok,I'll start with my own homecity,Calcutta.I still do prefer to call it Calcutta.And not Kolkata.But officially im compelled to use the latter.Ok.This is totally according to my analysis
of the whole city-name-change syndrome in Indian politics.The name Calcutta was often mocked by certain Indians as "kalla-kutta",considering the large population of stray dogs,mainly black,living in the city.It was one of those days when the CM..or Governor...or maybe the PM...was startled by the report of the Stray-Dogs department of Calcutta on how our city name resembled the kala-kuttas and how insulting it was to the 'black dogs'.(I'm not talking about the famous scotch brand)The eminent leaders were consulted...along with all the literary big-shots,the artists,the filmstars...the local people,of course,were ignored.They passed the Bills,the Acts,the Affidafits...and all the other documents.Yes,Kolkata,City of Joy.

I like the story of Mumbai.The name-change drive was basically to ward of terrorists and D-gang members.You see,Bombay was the target of certain terrorist activity all throughout the 90's.So the Al-qaida,Osama,the henious Mohammeds and Ahmeds saw Bombay as "Bomb-Aye".It was an invitation.So they went around merrily bombing the entire city with whatever they can.As usual,they never gave a shit to our Aamchi-Mumbai public.The police force didnt help.The Army was busy in Kashmir.So the Government came out with the perfect solution.Change the name.No Bomb-word to be included in the city name.Mumbai,yes,the junta likes that.The public were happy.The terrorists were pissed off.So they bombed around a bit more.Damn.

Chennai was next.See,all this time when the country was thinking about black dogs and terrorists bombing,the city didnt get much attention.Madras was trying all the best to stay clean,ensure a proper city life for all its non-hindi speaking people.They were happy with their own little city,beaches and Rajnikanth.But they still didnt get attention.Veerapaan tried to get them some,but it didnt help much.I dont remember who it was.Jayalalitha or Karunnanidhi? If u break it up...Madras,becomes "Mad-ras"cals.This was good enough for them to change the name.Chennai.Everyone was happy.Rajnikanth celebrated by doing some Tamil item numbers with his stunts.But they still suffer from the complex that they aint getting an attention.Shit.

Bengaleru was more incident based.Bang-a-lore.The IT hub and the asia's pub capital had more people banging each other wherever they could.On the streets.In the pubs.Inside offices.In cars.Under lamposts.Everywhere.People became too much horny.Cases of rape and eve-teasing increased.When the people were done with,they started raping dogs.Of ccourse,not many in the democracy liked it.They tried Bengore.Blore.Bangy,naaah!Ye ye,I still have no clue why they kept the name as Bengaleru.Maybe its for the firangs.Maybe they get turned on.

I wonder why Chandigarh's name still remains same.Chandigarh literally means to have the "moon in ur ass" when transalated to hindi.The religious clerics are still cool with that.And so is the CBI.Or why Luck-now or Luck-no is still Lucknow inspite of Lady Luck real hard to make out there.
And then Hyderabad.Oh wtf!Their name hasnt changed.Fucken Hyderabadis!Scratch-scratch!

Some things in this world are strange.Most people are strangers.But then people do seem strangers when you are strange yourself.I sometimes think whether governemnts do not have any other work other than changing names of cities.Would that really help in our social ..caste....religious problems.They talk about harmony when all they really do is create a furore about which name actually suits our cities.Ha!

Ok,I have no clue why i wrote this post.This is as meaningless as my job itself.This is too amateurish and too worthless.And its my secret way of requesting the goverment to focus more on the people.

Damn ..its her!!!!

FAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACK!!!!!

Why did I ever have that dream? I cant get over her.I cant.I just fucking cant.I kept thinking about her the whole day.And then realized that she's soooo not for me.But I still cant stop thinking of her.And its all so fucking sudden.Her????!! Of all people??!!!Mossad tried to talk me outta it.With the off-the record chat.But sorry,matey,I keep thinking of her! Even coffee didnt help.I had loads of it.Tried some decafe too.Just to forget the thought of me being 'with' her.But its just that she's been so awefully sweet to me.Coincidentally,whenever I was down.But how can I even imagine me with her.Then thinking of all the things that has happened with her during the past few years.Yes,this is so damn wierd.And Im trying to avoid anything or anyone who closely resembles her.This could turn up into one of the worst friendship disasters in my life.
Dude,it aint happening.Trust me,for your sake,it aint gonna happen.

Why cant I have these dreams with Subarna or Priya???!!!

Ohh and nevermind the video...it a stupid spoof of the Pirates,johhny depp and knightley!!!

Some brief scribbled random notes........

• The Carnival was awesome.Its probably the best hippie bar in Pune.

• Omkar,Amrita.Thanks.I had the best bengali food in days.Motton,Kosha Mangsho,Aloo-Poshto,Fish chop,Paabda Maach,Dal-Maamlet.

• I hate the new haircut of mine.I should have stuck to my idea of shaving it all off.But now it looks really weird.I also hate the shirt I wore to office today.But I hate my haircut more.

• They didnt give me 3.7 grands from my salary.Jherechi.Udom jherechi.The bastards.

• I'm logging into orkut,properly,after ages.Actually pretty good.I deleted my entire album.I'm thinking of when to login again properly and delete my entire scrapbook.And then of course my profile.Too much saturated.

• A cabbie talked me into having second thoughts about my religious faith.He gave me an entire 15 kilometer session on how God is important to my life.I made the mistake of telling him on how I didnt have much faith in Him.And I was the slight socially drunk then.

• Why don't I ever take the bus through the University road.Damn!!!

• Yes,Sap and Angshu's call made me a bit nostalgic.I miss good ol' Silver Sands.Or Oly.Dansberg beer.And the beef-steaks.

• And Peter Cat.Sigh!!!

• Most of the people around me like to live in their little boxes of their own.Like believing that whatever they do is correct,not exploring other avenues,not talking risks or beleiving in thinking different.They follow the mob.They never change their views.I just feel sorry.
  

• I have my foreign collegues telling me how beautiful Taj Mahal is.I should go to sleep.

• Go to sleep.go to sleep.G o t o s l e e p ! GO TO SLEEP. gO tO sLEEP.Go2Slp.Goo-too-slip.peels ot og.

Now go!

You Savvy???!!!!

Ok.

Dont trust the reviews.Never.If they said,its not thrilling,they were wrong.Absolutely.If they said,it didnt live up to the expectations,they were wrong.If they said,its too much complicated and melodramatic,they were wrong.If they said,Capt'n Jack Sparrow had a cameo role,then they were definitely wrong.

In my words.Its was amaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaazing!A complete knock-out thrilling ride on the high seas,through the whirlpool and then to the world's end.Jack stole the show.Amazingly superb effects.Full show.Loved it.Relived it.

Yes,it was a bit too stretched.But,who gives a fuck to that,matey!

And they all did this without a single drop of rum.Now aye,Why's my rum gone???

"Deb,you've changed"
Someone told me that over the phone today afternoon.I'm not the same ol' crazy Deb.I'm the serious matured fuck-up Debanuj.The one who seems to give a fuck to the world around him.I had no reply for what I was hearing.To think of it,yes I have.For some,like my mom,I'll still be Tutai,the kid.For some,like Roy,i'll still the be mysterious chodna Nunku.But for the most others,I'll be the changed one.Maybe not.I really have no clue on how this change works.Time flies.Ye,it always does.It seemed just a few days back,one of my favourite cousins had joined high school.He's almost finishing college now.
And there was that whole myriad of things I went through.Jojo my dog,dadu,my plastic rings,the tunes of childhood,then the school-frolic,the college ego and the as usual corporate whore.I keep looking back sometimes. Especially on Friday nites on the terrace with beer and smokes.
Childhood was the usual one.Playing with He-mans and Gi-joes in a perfect traditional Bengali house was a bit wierd.But then I also did have a stint with the tri-cycles and with squishing orange peels into everyone's eyes.Then came the ranna-bati games and the football.And of course TV and VCR's and lotsa bengali movies.
Bosco reminds me a lot.Bosco gave me the perfect school life.Bawaali,the schoolboy desperation,the stupid classroom fun,mathematics,literature,geography,lots of football again and definitely cricket.Sometimes Delhi.Its probably just sad the terms mean nothing to me anymore.I guess it was just a start.The start was Bosco.
I really cant phrase what college really means to me.I mean I cant say it sucked or it was totally awesome( like KKHH,lol).But if there's one thing I'm nostalgic about the most in my life,its college.I have no reasons.Probably it was the hostel.Or the winters and the rains.And probably everyday we had something new to do.Even it was sleeping or eating or doping or drinking or the trips or even studying during the semester exams were fun.The independence was good.And so was the dependence.Sikkim.
Job life sucks fullstop The short life at Mysore was really the shorgo-dorshon before kicking me to hell.I loved Mysore then.Even the waking up was luxurious.King's life.
Now I have this routined life.Yes,weekends are seriously fun.I'm not complaining about Pune or Bombay.Pune is my-kinda town.But I cant seem to relive the dream of going to the bar to drink a beer everyday after work.Bottomline.Job life sucks.They make me work at night.Dont pay me proper salary.I drink coffee.Make me work like a bitch.And I listen like a bitch.

This post aint as insignificant.
Damn!There I go again.Go fuck off.And they say I've changed.Now gimme that Jack Daniels!
Cya people.Have a great weekend.And Tinky,happy budday again girl!!!!

A bit of Love actually

Love is absurd.
So when feelings melt into the softness of the heart,is that love?When thoughts keep coming back to you.When feelings fade but memories still remain.
Just to say "how beautiful you look" or a whispery "I love you".Its the young love.The beginning.Those little moments.That gaze into each other's eyes.That cute brushing of hands.Just understanding how big the feeling means,even however little it is.Even a sexy Uma Thurman-ish babe.The face-blushing and that idyllic smile.Maybe,even the tears.

I dont mean to be all love-philosophical and be movie-ish.But I've always wanted to write this.I'm just a bit paranoid about this thing 'Love'.Im bad at it.In fact,I suck at it.So I really dont wish to be questioned on why im writing or saying this.Maybe,its because I'm just a perfect daft schumk.Or was that a prick(???).But.I'm moved by the power of love to alter and define our lives.Quite inexplicably,love does sometimes ruin the lives of many,but the amount of influence it has over mortals does amaze me.The cruel and crushed love.The Pathetic one.The walking wounded ones.Even happiness loses out to love.For some,love is lost or just found in a tingling moment across the street,in a l'il party or in a bar.And then there are people,like me.For me,Love is just blind.

Its just aweful when you first fall in love.Have those infatuations.That crush over one-whom-you-think-to-be-the-one.Those sleepless nights going over what she said and what she actually meant.Those moments of laughter.The butterflies fluttering-hard in the tummy.Of looking into eyes and giving that sheepishly shameful smile.Its like melody.Where every note played,is as beautiful as love itself.Even like drops of rain.
Its not just about taking her in your arms or spending a night in bed.Its about being there.Wherever and whenever.Its about the feeling when she just says a "hi".Or maybe "how are you" or a "I care about you a lot".Its red and weird.The feeling.

After everything,you still remember how a humble someone had once said "After all,I'm just a guy standing in front of a girl,asking her to love me,even though we are world's apart."
Yes,Love is truly blind.And absurd.And weird.

I'm just sad that I came to know Avril Lavigne has already been married to that SUM41 guy.This is a too-corny post.But I love corny.